Trapped in an unwanted friendship? Find out signs you are in a toxic
friendship and decide when to leave.
I never know there were times I have ever been surrounded by fake friends
until I read an article about signs of toxic friendship. I evaluated my circle
and was able to point out,”Okay, A is no
cool anymore” in a term of good friendship, so I slowly but surely left the
boat.
It was not easy for me to do so. We’ve been together for the whole year.
She was my first acquaintance on high school, went to be my classmate – and even seatmate. However, things
changed and went uncontrollable. I knew
this relationship went much too wrong. It would be better if we ended this
quickly so no one would get hurt.
The question is, how did I know
when did it change to be a toxic friendship? How did I know when was the
momentum to quit it? Today I will share some of the signs of this toxic
friendship. Check out which point that has happened to you.
Love over friendship
Take a break for a minute and analyze that one person. Does he/she always
put up his/her romantic relationship first before anything – even you? If it happened once or twice :
sudden missing from group project’s meeting or important plan the two of you
have made before – then it will be just fine. But if the absents keep on loop,
you know when to ask him/her about your presence in this friendship.
Verbal bullying
This might not be easily detected by you because you notice him/her as a funny
person. But do you ever realize that actually he/she is just trying to smoothly
cover his/her hidden motive? Remember
the time he/she said bad stuff about you, but ended with,”Just kidding, okay?”
so that you didn’t take it seriously. But what if he/she really meant it? The
countless mocking-which-covered-by-sugar-icing should’ve been avoided in a
healthy friendship, even if it happened just for once.
A “beggar” friend
You can’t reject her request when she asks you to lend her some money,
whatever the reason is. Once is fine. Twice is still tolerated. But thrice, or
more? She might think of you as her piggy bank which no need to be paid back, no!
Faux promise
Say, he promised you to pay a visit on Saturday night, binge watching a
new TV series the two of you have been missing off. However, he suddenly called
you an hour before the time you’ve decided, uttered “sorry” for countless time,
said that he can’t make it this time but sure, next week we’ll be for sure.
Surprisingly, he repeats the “sorry” and “let’s do it next time” scenario again
on the next week and this hasn’t just happened once or twice, but … a ton. Will
there be ever the real “next time”?
Having the whole own world
Finally the two of you get a quality time to Starbucks and chit-chat,
catching up a weekly round you’ve missed. Look what she’s doing! Picking up a
call for someone you don’t know, keep looking on her phone for new notification
of pic she uploaded on Instagram, etc. She is enjoying her own world without
even listening to your single word ... So sickening!
If you notice all those points between you and your mega best friend,
then congratulations, by now you have
to rethink about this friendship as a good one or the other way around.
It is
always difficult to say goodbye to someone who has known you for too long, but
if thing keeps going on as it is between the two of you, then … I am afraid you
will encounter worse condition. Don’t make an obvious move that you are
avoiding him. Walk slowly at a time until you’ve become completely comfortable
of walking down the corridor alone. If he notices the change of you, tell him
the truth. You’ll thank yourself by being brave of taking a correct decision.
Have you ever been in a toxic
friendship? Or do you know another sign of toxic friendship we should be wary?
