Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone

There are times I will crawl out from my bed. There are days I will turn my phone off and have a conversation face to face. There are … but not today.

I have been using this “not today” excuse almost for the whole of my life to be slacking off in my nest – and this excuse goes stronger thanks to BTS’ newest track title “Not Today” – and avoiding the society. If I have to meet an appointment outside, with a group of completely strangers, I will do it quickly so that I can come back home soon. This goes well as if I am in a situation to work with some acquaintances as a group, and I always find myself being uncomfortable and face the group discussion awkwardly.

Well, we all have friends whom we are comfortable with, don’t we? So do I. I have certain circles during my study session in university, and these circles have their own roles. If I may categorize them, those will be : “study mates”, “classmates”, and “playmates” – oops, let’s not forgetting the “spazzing mates”.

At some points it is very uncomfortable for me to be in group with my “play mates” to sign in a group project, and this scheme goes as well with the other two circles. I work the best with my “study mates”, hang out lively with “play mates”.

Vice versa.

I am actually quite aware of the consequence. I admit it by myself that I am lacking in self-preparedness when it comes to unexpected situation. I see myself become easily tempered, impatience, and nervous when I face such situation. In a more cruel words, I am lacking in self-growth as a human being.

I try to sort things out and it appears that I have been hiding for too long in my pleasant eggshell. To remember of it, I forget : when did the last time I step out from my comfort zone?

No answer.

Thus, as for today I will write down several tips that I’ve tried – and have helped me – to step out from my comfort zone. These tips may look simple as it is, but these are worth to try.

Turn off your phone and get real-offline conversation

Technology brings thousand goodness to our life, but let’s not forgetting there is always bad and good side of everything. Yin and yang. Gandhi and Hitler. While it makes us easier to connect with people from afar, on the other side it also makes us get lazier to build real connection. I guess the problem here is because we think can control almost everything – yes, almost everything – just by the tip of our fingers.

Turn off your phone for 2 or 3 hours – it could be during your meet up agenda with a friend you’ve never met for certain years – and have a deep talk. You’ll get surprised by how things are actually outside your tiny smartphone.

Experience new things, visit new places :  just try something new

During the freshman year I mostly spent my time at classroom. Where was I after school? Home, of course. However, boredom struck unexpectedly, so I decided to have some private study times between two classes. I went to campus’ library and spent one to two hours there – by myself – enjoyed the whole new atmosphere I have never sensed before. It went smooth beyond my expectation. It wasn’t bad at all, to sit on wood chair and read back my notes I jot down at class, or stroll from one shelf to another and get a glance over Shakespear’s script.

Now I know why traveler are always excited to plan their next travelling destination. Different places bring different stories. And those always seem like a brand new experiences. Go start yours. It doesn’t have to be a luxurious trip to Japan or Greece LOL! It can be a thrifty evening walk around your neighborhood instead. Who knows what you’ll find there.

Let go of yourself

I am that type of person who barely initiate a conversation at first meeting. I am suck at it. I remember this clearly as if it happened yesterday. It was during my freshman year – at orientation day – where I met my first friend. Indah was on the same boat as me. 15 minutes we spent by shutting our mouth tight while we were sitting next to each other felt like forever to me.

That was very uncomfortable, and awkward as hell.

I don’t know what made me suddenly asked her one or two trivia questions that got us occupied during the boring speech acceptance. Now I think I can reward myself a big thank you for letting go of myself at that time. I am finally able to be friend with a great designer and illustrator like Indah. If I didn’t talk to her before, perhaps I wouldn’t discover such a talented girl like her in our department! (Check out her amazing drawings here!)

Don’t get discouraged by negative people

You thought your people are good. Not at all. No matter how much you want to stick in this belief, sadly we know it’s wrong.

Not every person is ready facing “changes”. So does your friend. There will be a guy who can not accept the way you are trying to be. He will show his complain by giving you negative thinking, saying that you should quit and get back to your usual self.

Don’t get discouraged by tongue-in-cheek comments. Instead you can attempt to understand this happens because he is being envious of your progress. Tell him the true reason and ask for his understanding too. If he is absolutely insisted on, quit the toxic relationship ASAP.

Face your fear

We know first move is the most bothersome part of starting anew. We become nervous and scared at the same time. We attempt to evaluate each step we are going to take. If I did this, would I be okay? Would I be fine?

We call it “fear”. It is normal to sense fear. However we need to know that it will give us no good if we keep developing negative thought on our mind for a long period. Deal with it. Convince yourself you can pass the consequence well.

When I look out on Internet for similar topic, I am glad there have been lots people writing about this. It means society are already concerned about this issue as well as I am. I will be contented if you find this post is useful. You are very welcomed to share the words and let’s not break the chain. The more we are encouraged to do good thing, the easier it will be for us to step on it, isn’t it? Good luck trying on your own!